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May-May's Diary
Entry for May 22, 1998
First, my darlings, here is the news!!! The Ro-Ro bar on Hengshan Lu seems to have closed, and Nightcat (Ye maozi) on Huaihai Xi Lu is getting rave reviews as THE place to be late at night. Park 97 now has tables outside in the park in the evenings, which is gorgeous, and I'm hearing constant reports about how good the food is at that shrine of cool warmness, Zoobaa on Fuxing Lu!!!
A couple of nights ago, I was taken by a friend of mine went to a new place on Changshou (Long Life) Lu called Apocalypse Now (Xianzai Qishi Lu) which is sort of like a cross between 99 Disco and Meilongzhen Chinese restaurant. They serve noodles and beancurd in a cavernous and metallic space that would have worked as a set for the futuristic parts of the Terminator movies. The toilets are particularly scary, with light boxes on the floor that make it seem as if you're walking over an abyss!!
The centerpiece of the bar/restaurant, which has been packed out the time I was there, is a stage and a Filipino band. They came on stage and started into their first song which was the theme from Titanic, called My Heart goes on and on and on and on and on and on ... and on!!! In fact, I'm sick to death of the this song. A beautiful melody which has already been completely ruined by total overkill overexposure. The opening notes of the song were greeted with applause from the crowd. But my partner completely embarrassed both himself and me by screaming at the top of his voice: "JACK!!!!"
Many people, including myself, have often asked the question: why is it that a major industrial city like Shanghai does not have a thriving rock music scene, with long-haired boys thrashing away on guitars in sweaty clubs, working all that working class angst out of their systems? Providing their young audiences with a cathartic release from the intensely urban, grey and structured world in which they live? (That's what it says here, anyway!!!) They have it in Beijing, after all, and even Guangzhou. Why not here?? Well, I asked this question yet again of a long-haired Shanghai artist I had dinner with this evening (Xu Zhen), and he said there IS such a music scene here!!! Several young rock bands play regularly at the Go Go Bar on Jin Sha Jiang Lu, near the East China Normal Univerity! Has anyone been there, my loves??? Please pass on any information you have on this important discovery!!!
I have received a lovely email from a fan who asks to remain anonymous. No problem, Arnold, your secret is safe with me!!!! No, I'm just joking, his name is not Arnold. He wrote in response to the couple of negative emails I have received recently and included in my reports. Here's what he says (such a dear!!!):
Dear May-may, Congratulations on reaching true celebrity status ... No one can be truly be famous and loved without some weirdos writing hate letters, right? Now all you need is a stalker and the picture would be complete. Hahaha ... Tell us his name and there will be plenty of people willing to go to the "prestigious" rat hole and stick his keyboard up his little derriere. Let me guess, is this a Harvard guy? Anyways... I love your column. Keep going May-may!"
How nice!! How romantic! I have a knight in shining armor ready to ride to my assistance at any moment!! So just watch your manners!!!!
Byeeeee!!!
Entry for May 20, 1998
Last night I was down at that new bar on Urumqi Lu -- George V -- and watched in amazement as a man from Beijing named Jiang Guoying juggled six, seven and then EIGHT pingpong balls into the air with his mouth, spitting them up, catching them in his mouth as they came down. Boys and girls, THIS is entertainment!! The manager of the bar, who you will remember is quite Frank, laughed and told me he had asked Mr Jiang if he had lots of girlfriends. What on earth is he talking about? I have given this a lot of thought and I cannot think of any way whatsoever in which to connect Mr Jiang's obvious juggling skills and the richness of his personal life. We will have to watch Frank. He might be quite mad.
The Pink bar has opened on Tongren Lu. You may remember that I offered them a total marketing package in which I would make suggestions on changes to the decor, organise the opening, invite all my friends, arrange the music ... WHAT an offer!!! The owner, with the wonderfully poetic name of Mr Dong, said in effect "don't call me, I'll call you", and of course he didn't. And now we will watch on the sidelines -- FIRMLY on the sidelines -- and see how they do. Don't get me wrong. I am not suggesting for a second that my participation in the promotion of the bar was a precondition for its success. I am sure it stands at least as much of a chance of surviving in the cut-throat world of Shanghai's nightlife as a defenseless, orphaned kitten would in a den of wolves.
I am already preparing, just in case, a marketing plan for a new bar to be called "Blue".
I went the other night to the opening of a new Chinese restaurant. Nothing extraordinary about that, surely, you say. There are millions of Chinese restaurants in Shanghai. Well, that's true. But this one is called Henry's and it is run by Adam Zhu, one of the investors in the Gap chain of restaurants. It is on Xinle Lu, just at the Shaanxi Lu intersection, and has a nouveau chinoise feel to the decor, just like darling Michelle's 1221. It feels friendly to the foreigners and a bit western to the Chinese. The food? Shanghainese, but when I was there, the kitchen had already closed, so I am unable to give you an assessment. The key, of course, is the onion cake. Western restaurants can be judged by their french fries, Shanghainese restaurants by their onion cake!
I didn't tell Adam this, but in fact I was approached by someone about a year ago who was offering this location around and wanted me to find a taker for him. I brought it to the attention of a couple of my best friends, who looked at it and turned it down. BUT I think they may have got it wrong. It is a great location, the building is old and stylish, and I will assume the chefs are competent. I told Adam that he should consider opening until at least 2am to give people at MGM and the Golden Age nightclub nearby somewhere to go for a bowl of nocturnal noodles. I gave him this advice absolutely free of charge. Ridiculous. But let's face it -- I am no businesswoman. More like Late Night Shanghai's Florence Nightingale!!
The people at Shanghai-ed have passed on to me another email from that University in the United States I mentioned before where standards of politeness seem to be slipping to new lows. But it's not just manners we're talking about here, it's style. It appears Princeton is suffering a shortage. The letter refers to my generous offer to chaperone Hilary round to a few Shanghai nightspots when she is here next month:
"Dear May May, believe it or not, my older sister Andrea is well-connected to the White
House, since she worked at the Council of Economic Advisors for a few years. But I can assure you that neither Mr. or Mrs. Clinton would be caught dead in the presence of your fat ass.
Again: stop flattering yourself and just stay to the important details about the clubs and bars. When I come down to Shanghai again, I will have a talk with Shanghai-ed and make sure that my Brother Malik takes over your spot. Eckhart"
Let us analyse this letter, from an academic point of view. I never went to Princeton, but there are several logical flaws that even I can spot. We will assume that Eckhart, if that is his real name, actually does have a sister named Andrea and that she worked (past tense) at this council he mentions:
1. There is the implication that this gives Eckhart an inside track to the Clinton's which he chooses not to make use of. Unproven.
2. There is an assumption about the willingness of the Clintons to be seen with me. Also unproven and, I believe, incorrect.
3. The assumption that my "ass" is fat. Incorrect. Eckhart is guilty of that academic no-no of leaping to a conclusion without sufficient empirical evidence to back it up.
4. That Malik would take over my "spot". I have never met Malik, but I have read his "Black Shanghai" report here on Shanghai-ed and I think he is very sweet. And I somehow doubt Eckhart's ability to convince the lovely people at Shanghai-ed to put him in charge of the Nightlife report.
But Eckhart, thank you so much for writing and do have a nice day!!!!
Byeeeee!!!
Entry for May 18, 1998
I have a big scoop for all you music fans in Shanghai, boys and girls!!! I ran into the most handsome and charming man yesterday who speaks English like it is supposed to be spoken in Oxford but usually isn't, and wearing the most stylishly understated but obviously expensive suit that I have ever seen in Shanghai. He completely bowled me over!! But where was I? Oh yes, music. This gentleman, for that is what I am sure he is, is involved in music promotions, and told me in the strictest confidence that Mariah Carey, Michael Bolton, Kenny G and Celine Dion are ALL coming to Shanghai!!! My god, it's as if Joy FM suddenly became 3-D video!!!
But in the world of Chinese music events, you have to be very careful. Richard Marx was supposed to visit China this year, but I have it on extremely good cufflinked authority that the responsible officials in the relevant departments canceled it after the sponsoring company started publicizing the concerts before final approval had been obtained!! Whoops!!!
Well, really!!! I have received another email from a certain prestigious American university, which borders on bad taste, so I absolutely have to pass it on. I will spare the writer the embarrassment of mentioning his name, but feel compelled to say that the name of the university which he attends begins with the letter "P". Here is what it says:
"Dear may-May. you know what the CURRENT BIG THING in Shanghai is? Yes, you guys right! Your amazingly large bottom! Byeeeeeeeee!!"
My dear sir, while the size of my bottom is of no concern of yours directly, I am will to say that it has been praised for its petiteness. So I think this is a "wuweh", as we say in Shanghainese -- I think you must have the wrong person, possibly my aunt.
Also in the May-May mailbag is a message from "nc", who is obviously a shy and retiring flower. He or she says: "Dear May-May, in response to your request for wierd sites, proceed to the site of all sites, the home of the world's fastest growing snack food religion that replaces sins with grins through the smile of J.R."Bob" Dobbs, the living avatar of Slack, The Church of the Sub Genius."
And yet another charming letter from one of my fans: "Dear May-May, I have been reading your report on and off for almost 3 months. thanks for the valuable insight especially for the newcomers. let me know when does your star tv special comes on, i like to see you. you know,
everytime when i go out during night time i always wonder...it i can see you, at least want to confirm that you are a real human being. any way, no doubt you are partying (do you have a day job) i have to sign off and get some sleep. a reply would be much appreciated.
Well, I'm glad you brought up the Star TV special. There were intense negotiations of the format of my appearance and, let us say, artistic differences emerged which proved to be insurmountable. No-one was more upset than me, my darlings. I have been waiting to get on satellite TV ever since it started. But I am confident that another opportunity will arise before too long. Stardom on an international level con only be just around the corner!!! The question is only: which corner???!!!
Byeeeee!!!
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