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May-May's Diary
Entry for April 10, 1998
I see Vanessa Mae, the female violinist, is playing in Shanghai on Friday and Saturday night. I call her female because her gender seems to be a very important part of the package for this pop star. My favorite violinist in Shanghai, Li Zhisheng, who is now playing at two or three different places around town, says he is not bothering to go to the concert - her technique, he says, is nothing special, it is all marketing hype!! I don't think it's jealousy!!
I heard last night about a certain nightspot somewhere near the Equatorial Hotel that has a telephone on each table, allowing patrons to phone to strangers sitting on other tables, inviting them to have a drink, or to ask such questions as "What do you think of the music?" (see my report yesterday for a discussion of the best pickup lines of all time!!). Have you ever heard of this place? I am fairly active on the nightlife scene, as you may have gathered, but I have never heard of this place before. If it exists, how on earth did it escape my attention??!! Anyway, if you know anything about this interesting establishment, please do send me a message. Just click on the email link above my report.
Increasingly people online seem to be turning to me for advice. I don't mind this at all. It is just like life in the real world, in fact!! I really don't know why, but I seem to be one of those "advisors of the heart" that people like to confide in when they have problems, particularly of a romantic nature. You learn about this area of life by making mistakes, and I have made vastly more than my fair share. Being a Chinese girl in Shanghai seems to mean being very aware that the road to love is often rocky. Anyway, here is a query I received recently from one of my fans, Ramin, in Switzerland (my fans are to be found in all corners of the globe, it seems! Such is the power of the Internet!! It cannot just be my personality alone!!!)
"Dear May-May, accidently found your nightlife homepage. I think it's a great page. It really helps you trying to imagine what nightlife is like in Shanghai. Anyway, let me tell you why I mail you. I am a Med. student in Switzerland and just got accepted for a student exchange at the Shanghai Medical University for my final year. Now, since I have never been there and you seem to know your way perfectly around this city, I wondered if you give me some advice. I don't really know if I should accept this offer. I mean, I love the Asian lifestyle and I spent 7 months in Tokyo about a year ago. But still Shanghai has got to be a lot different and I don't speak a word of Chinese. Plus I don't know anyone in that city. Is it hard to meet people there? From what I read on your page nightlife`s got to be great. I`d be happy for some personal advice from you. Thanks May-May. love Ramin"
Well, Ramin, I wouldn't say I know my way perfectly around the city, although I seem to spend much of my life giving directions to my friends, the taxi drivers!! First, congratulations in being accepted by the Shanghai Medical University. The key question for me is: how hard is it to meet people here?? I would say, not difficult at all, although this may just be my personality. In any city, it depends on how you go about it, and how much effort you put into it. For someone who makes a serious effort to get to know the nightlife scene in Shanghai, I think it can be cracked quickly and easily. There is a girl who arrived from Switzerland less than a month ago who I had never met before. But I constantly see her in all the usual places, and we've even done a couple of double dates together. She seemed to find no difficulty in breaking through. I won't give her name, but you might even run into her and have the great romance of your life!! Anything, and I mean anything, is possible in Shanghai!!!
Byeeeee!!!
Entry for April 8, 1998
Sacrilege!! Destruction of cultural relics!!! I was in the Fuxing Park today on my way to Park 97 when I noticed that the mushroom litter bin which has stood proudly outside the restaurant entrance since its opening has been removed and replaced by a stainless steel version. I have asked the people at Shanghai-ed to include a picture of the mushroom on this page. You will find it to the left of my column. To me, this mushroom always represented an important part of our history, and I am just appalled that it would be removed. The new bin has attached to it a sign saying it was donated by "Commuters Ball and Park 97". I think they should be ashamed of themselves. And I think the mushroom should be replaced immediately. Yours indignantly, May-May.
Speaking of the Titanic, which I was a couple of days ago, I see that a Swiss company has decided to build an exact replica of the ship, but with more modern navigation equipment etc. The company's head said: "It will not sink." I don't plan to book a trip on the ship's first voyage!!!
I understand there is a movement afoot to make May Day this year into May-May's Day. I think this is taking adulation too far and I do not support it.
A new bar has been opened in my honour on Tiantong Lu called (of course) May-May's. I have not had time to visit yet, but I have already passed on my sincere thanks to the owners. I trust the use of my name, which I have allowed free of charge, will help them become unbelievably prosperous!!!
I have some more information about the Ro-Ro bar, which I mentioned yesterday. The one on Hengshan Lu in the La Promenade complex. The owner's name, it turns out, is Ron Ron and somehow she dropped the "n" when she named her bar. How careless!! The dancer Ms Jiang, I am reliably informed, is regularly acting in TV mini-series. It is becoming a magnet for the arts and culture set. So I intend to be there frequently. To help raise the tone of the place!!
I have to come clean on another mistake in my report from last week. I referred to a bar on Siping Lu called Tribal Men. I have received a message from the bar informing me that the name is in fact "Tribesman". I apologise, Owen, please forgive me!!! Owen asks me to tell you that the Tribesman, whoever he is, hosts live music most nights of the week, usually of the rock and roll variety. "In
addition, going up in a few days is an exhibition of photographs by one
local photographer and two foreign students (one being myself)," says Owen. I must come and see. I do love photographs!! And Owen, I have been asked by the folks at Shanghai-ed to tell you that they would be happy to put your photos up in their photo gallery, Owen. Fame and fortune is just around the corner!!
Byeeeee!!!
Entry for April 7, 1998
My information is not always as good as I would like to think, boys and girls. I see myself as being the most informed and up-to-the-minute plugged-in person on Shanghai's bright and extensive nightlife. But even I sometimes gets it wrong! Yes, it's true!! For instance: the Shenji Liangtang soup restaurant on the corner of Fuxing Lu and Sinan Lu is a place with lots of history for me -- I've had several significant trysts there, some happy, some sad, all of them interesting. Anyway, the restaurant has been under renovation for weeks now, and I have been waiting on tenterhooks to find out what happens to it. Will it remain a Shenji Liangtang or metamorphose into something else? A McDonald's or a teahouse? Then, two days ago I heard that it was staying as a Shenji Liangtang and would be opening on April 7. I braved the rain and made my way over there only to find my information was ... incorrect!! Workman still in place, no sign of an end in sight!!! Hurry up, Mr Shen, I have a couple urgent and significant trysts waiting for it to re-open!
I understand Nike is launching, or has launched a new slogan to replace "Just Do It", which I believe people are sick of even in inaccessible and forested regions of northern Hubei. I hear, and I hope this time that my information is wrong -- that the new slogan is "You Can". How weak. How flabby. Here's a proposed new slogan for Nike that I just thought of: "Life - what a trip!!" That's my personal motto, and I am happy to donate it to Nike for only a modest sum!!
There's a new bar lurking half-hidden in the La Promenade complex lining Hengshan Lu opposite the American Church -- it is called Ro-Ro and can be found behind the broad stairs in the main lobby the building. Why Ro-Ro? Who knows? I have only just thought of the question, but will endeavour to get you an answer as soon as possible. I was down there the other night and met the charming, and very beautiful, if slightly over-made-up ladies who are running Ro-Ro. They swear they are sisters, but have different surnames and different parents. Possible? One of them is Ms Jiang (ginger) who dances in a most exquisite, almost Indian way, although she says she has never received any formal training in Indian dancing. I think the Tandoor restaurant should initiate a take-over bid immediately!!!
I have received an absolutely gorgeous and moving fan letter from Nathan in Pasadena, who says:
"I love you daily column very much and I can just imagine how busy you are tied up with writing all the letters and reports on the Shanghai Night Life. I think you are a great reporter with a personal touch, and
I am looking forward to see more of your good works."
Oh, Nathan! I am blushing, I really am!! He continues with a serious question which I think I am in a position to offer some advice on:
"I have tried talking to people of different sex in social grounds not entirely unlike the ones you have visited, and the problem I had was I was never sure I had asked the wrong questions. So my question for you was what does it take for other party to engage you actively in a conversation. What do you like or dislike to see the other party say, act, or show? I am very sure that you are a connoiseur at this and I am hoping to hear back from you."
Let me begin by saying that a recent survey I read about in the United States showed that the most effective pick-up line for men to use on women in bars is: "What do you think of the music?", while the most effective line for women wanting to pick up men is just "Hi!"
Speaking personally, the one thing I do like, and which I think works very well, is quite sincere compliments -- and you have to mean it. Something like: "Excuse me, that's a very attractive dress your wearing. My guess is it is DKNY, is that right?" Choose something you find attractive about the person, but NOT their figure or face, please!!!
A line that was tried on me some time ago, which I thought was very nice was: "Do you think the music here is a bit loud, because I'd love to talk to you." I'm not saying if it worked or not.
And here's a slightly more direct line you could try: "I'm fairly certain I've seen you before somewhere. Are you a model?"
Okay, Nathan. There are some of May-May's secrets out in the open! I hope you find them useful.!!
Byeeeee!!!
Entry for April 6, 1998
Titanic Titanic Titanic, that's all people are talking about in Shanghai at the moment, isn't it, boys and girls! We really have re-joined the world. I'm told it's a lovely movie, although I haven't seen it yet. I understand from the front page of Shanghai-ed that Park 97 is having a special showing of the film with dinner and champagne attached this Saturday! Now, that's a good idea. I could put on a Mae West for the evening -- delusions of grandeur, just like James Cameron!!!
As I write this, it is very early Tuesday morning, there is a light rain falling, and I can hear a boat hooting on the river. Ooooh!!! Shivers down my spine!!! There is no time of day in Shanghai more atmospheric than 4am, particularly after a busy nightlife-packed evening. The perfect antidote.
If I may, my darlings, I will choose another letter from the bulging May-May postbag: this time from the sharming Chalet (that's an intentional spelling error, by the way!!):
"Good evening May May, I know whenever you actually read this message, the above greeting will always be appropriate, wouldn't you agree? Anyhow, I have been reading your column for some time now, and it's been an informative source for finding out what's happening in Shanghai, where I grew up, from one perspective. A rather interesting one, I have to say. I have been back in Shanghai twice since I left. Having spent most of my
adult live in the United States, I found myself actively looking for
English-speakers when I went about experiencing the social circles of
Shanghai. Unfortunately, most of the people I stumpled upon are disappointing. They are either snobbish, ego-driven business men(women) who think they are much more superior with their pale skin and high-rise
noses, or peons who simply can not make it in their own countries and had to rely on the advantages of being "foreign" and "rare". So I was hoping that you would prove me wrong by sharing with me some places where normal, humble and fun "foreigners" hang out."
Well, Chalet, I think I know the very people you mean. My ego is by no means small, and I mean that sincerely. But it is dwarfed by some of the other egos I bump into on my nightly rounds. And many (not all) of them belong to the kind of people you're referring to. My feelings on this subject are as follows: firstly, I think we Shanghainese are guilty to some extent of feeding the egos of these pale-skinned high-nose people. There's a long tradition of it -- it's where Yangjingbang-ness came from. Secondly, I think what the hell, just let them have their day in the sun. This period will be over soon enough. One day, you will find herds of western girls hanging around Shanghai bars looking for Shanghainese husbands!! Why not??
Chalet goes on to say: "Addressing the bar culture issue, I am wondering how could a
trend-conscious, fashion-forefront columnist like May May miss the "Martini" epidemic that's been around everywhere else in the world?!"
I have to confess, Chalet, that I am not a great drinker of alcohol. My brain is more than sufficiently a-buzz without the benefit of artificial stimulants!! As you probably noticed!!! I occasionally have a glass, of course, and a very charming gentleman the other night bought me a B-52, which I thought was very pleasant. Martini epidemic? Non. Not here, not yet. I have seen the occasional martini drunk in Shanghai nightlife places, but I know of no martini trend that has hit town. Do people have the special glasses, I wonder? You certainly couldn't drink a martini out of an ordinary glass!!! But if it's a fad in the States, then I guess it will be a fad here too eventually. We've had cigars, Titanic, blond guys ... Whoops!!! I forgot -- don't feed their egos!!!!
Byeeeee!!
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